My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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