just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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