i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
