Porn is love you can see.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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