One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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