after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
