I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
accomplished twins. life is a go
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
