He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I need moral support for this bender
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...