Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge†by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
