If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
