You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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