you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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