We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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