sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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