You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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