i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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