I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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