Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
how drunk are you?
Several
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
