your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
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It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
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drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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