porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Randomize