Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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