Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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