both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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