Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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