He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize