what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
