he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize