3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I had to cum in my sink.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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