When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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