I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
