Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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