I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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