well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
