ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize