Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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