i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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