I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
