I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
