well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
