I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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