dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
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