I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize