I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
