My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
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