listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize