Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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