Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
