my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
