He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
