Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Randomize
