I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
