R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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